The End of an Era

That’s really all I have to say. I worked at my city library for almost five years. I loved my job, my coworkers, and my patrons. I learned a lot, not just about the field but about my community and how true customer service comes from a place of empathy for the people you serve.

I wouldn’t trade these last five years for anything. I found my second calling, the only other job that makes me proud besides my writing. I’ve made lifelong friends and a lasting impact for my patrons.

I can’t really ask for more than that.

Hopefully, whatever job comes next, I’ll find that same meaning and pride in what I do. It makes all the difference when I wake up each morning.

Thanks for following me through these last few weeks. It’s been really hard not to be negative and to find the silver lining in this layoff, but I’m trying.

I’ll be back tomorrow with the Weekly Goals and the Monthly Recap. Gotta love when the first of the month falls on a Monday!

Til then, Bloggarts.

 

BZ

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That’s Rough Buddy

I’m having a day, Blogland. Lots of feelings I seem to have no control over. Which only compounds the whole “I feel out of control” anxiety I’ve been rocking these last two weeks.

Losing a job is hard. Losing a job you love is… harder.

I’m not sure that there are enough episodes of The Great British Bake Off to fix this. For once, there might not even be enough tacos to fix this. Which leaves two methods I haven’t tried: ice cream and booze.

I don’t know what I came here to accomplish, other than to write out some feelings and hopefully rally for the rest of this work day.

I don’t think it worked.

BZ

Goals Summary 2019 – Wk #25

Hiya Bloggos!

Last week was a bit of a rollercoaster for me. A phone interview, prepping for an in-person interview, a hike, yard work, and a migraine meant there just wasn’t a whole lot of writing time.

Last Week

  • Publish two blog posts
  • Revise In Great Need of Ghosts
  • Work on something fun!

How’d I do?

  • Publish two blog posts
    • Nope. Sorry about that.
  • Revise In Great Need of Ghosts
    • Yes! A got another revision done, and think I made some critical changes to help with pacing.
  • Work on something fun!
    • Not really? With all the resume building and interview prep, revising Ghosts was my fun work.

Weekly Word Count: 0

I hate writing that. Even when word count wasn’t a big goal, it feels bad to say I wrote nothing in a whole week. But I was busy, and very very distracted. I could very well be unemployed at the end of this week, so you know. I’ve got a lot going on in my brain right now.

One thing that helped with that was a hike at Cape Meares. Two weeks off from my weekend hikes had me winded for most of the morning, and was a harsh reminder that it’s so easy to lose forward momentum when it comes to fitness.

Another thing that helped was bingeing The Great British Bake Off and Good Omens. I love them both and found them so uplifting when my world was very suddenly dark.

Revisions on the short story continue. I think I fixed the big problem and from here I think it’ll be about streamlining the story, cutting, and making the words sing. I think placing it will be tricky. It’s a quiet story that doesn’t really fit into any one genre. But that’s okay. I believe that writing stories for ourselves is the most important thing. I wrote a story that I wanted to tell, and either I’ll find an editor that loves it like I do, or I won’t. And that’s okay.

These past couple weeks have been a big lesson in accepting the things I cannot change. You’d think, having grown up at AA meetings, I’d know how to do that already, but it’s been difficult. I like having control (who doesn’t) and when life gets out of control, I tend to panic. I’m doing a lot of deep breathing these days.

What’s Next?

  • Publish two blog posts
  • Finish In Great Need of Ghosts
  • Read something!

That’s it. I want to keep it simple this week. Read something, edit a bit, talk on the blog. Pretty much just get out of my head and onto the page. I’ll be waiting for news about an interview this week, and if I don’t do something escapist I will go insane. I’d really prefer not to.

That’s it Bloggarts. This is all I’ve got for you. The adrenaline of this morning’s interview is ebbing and I am so very tired now. I’ll be around.

 

BZ

 

 

Goals Summary 2019 – Wk #24

This week felt really long, Bloggos. And not in the best way. I got some pretty bad (and unexpected) news on Friday, and while I spent the weekend recuperating (I replayed Detroit Become Human ALL DAY Saturday) it’s safe to stay I’m still reeling a bit.

Last Week

  • Publish two blog posts
  • Polish In Great Need of Ghosts
  • Work on something fun!

How’d I do?

  • Publish two blog posts
    • Yarp. You can read my review of Knight’s Shadow now!
  • Polish In Great Need of Ghosts
    • Nope. Still waiting on some feedback and giving the story some distance.
  • Work on something fun!
    • Yes! I wrote some tumblr prompts and worked a tiny bit on my giant fanfic series. It felt really good to come back to it after all this time.

Weekly Word Count: 1,178

I’m a little distracted today. I have a phone interview for a job I really want, and I’m trying to distract myself with writing this post. It isn’t really working. I read things, wrote some things, and played video games. That’s it.

Next.

What’s Next?

  • Publish two blog posts
  • Revise In Great Need of Ghosts
  • Work on something fun!

I think a week off is enough for me to return to this story with fresh eyes and try to iron out what the hell is wrong with it. The problem is that I like a lot of the story, so the problem areas aren’t super clear. That’s why I’ve been waiting for feedback. Maybe new eyes can enlighten me.

Sorry for the brief post. It’s really all I can manage at the moment. I’ll be back later this week, one way or another.

 

BZ

Book Review – Knight’s Shadow (Greatcoats #2) by Sebastien de Castell

Bloggos,

You might not recall, but I listened to the first Greatcoats book back in December to help me through a pretty terrible migraine. You might want to read my review for Traitor’s Blade before you continue on with this one.

So, yeah. You might have noticed that I started reading Knight’s Shadow back in JANUARY. You might also have noticed how it went from my “Currently Reading” shelf on Goodreads to my “To Read” shelf, pretty quickly. Turns out, these books are audio or bust. I could NOT get into the story in a hard copy at all. I kept telling myself I’d get around to the series again, but months went by before I renewed my Audible subscription and found myself listening to Falcio’s story again.

Goodreads Rating: 4/5 Stars

knight's shadow

This book picks up right where the last one left off. Falcio, still suffering from the Dashini poison, Kest, and Brasti are at the Tailor’s camp with her Greatcoats and Aline. It’s a peaceful momnet, but it’s the Greatcoats. Peace doesn’t last long with these three.

An ambush by Trin’s soldiers forces the Tailor’s hand, so she sends Falcio, Kest, and Brasti off to secure Ducal support for Aline’s bid for the throne. Because, you know, the Dukes just loooooove the King’s Greatcoats. And so starts the doomed adventure.

What I loved:

  • Characters!!! I love Falcio, even when he’s being a big dummy, which is the majority of the time in this book. I love Brasti, the Bastard, and all his snark and arrogance. And I LOVE Kest. He’s so loyal to Falcio, funny in his own understated way, and just generally talk, dark, and broody. I can’t help but love him. But, this book did a wonderful job of making like even more characters than before. Valiana really came into her own in this one, and Falcio’s wife, Aline has some on screen time to make me love her too.
  • The world. Tristia is a complex place with tons of political intrigue, which I love. We got to see more of the small towns and villages in this book, which was a nice change from all the time spent in Rijou in the last book.
  • The narration. Again. Joe Jameson does a wonderful job giving voices to such a large cast of characters and making me care about all of them. I rarely wonder who’s talking, and if I do it’s usually because it’s a new character. I’m pretty sure I’d give anything Jameson narrated a listen, because he’s that good.

What I didn’t love:

  • The plot? I mean, it was fine, but it was really predictable for the most part. I knew who was behind the assassination attempts pretty much immediately. Again, as in the first book, a lot of the story hinges on Falcio not understanding or realizing what’s happening until it’s too late.
  • ******SPOILERS*********SPOILERS************SPOILERS************SPOILERS
  • The rape sequence. It was bad enough hearing about what happened to Falcio’s wife in the first book. In this book, Falcio is tortured with magic and forced to relive the horrible moment as if a fly on the wall in the room in which it happened. It was awful, which I get is the point, but Trin is there and experiencing it with him and finding pleasure in it…. it was gratuitous and made me very uncomfortable. Which, again, is probably the point. My point is, IT WAS AWFUL AND UNCOMFORTABLE and I couldn’t skip over it because I listened to the audiobook. Listeners beware.
    *****END SPOILERS***END SPOILERS***END SPOILERS***END SPOILERS***

There’s more to love here than there isn’t. Kest and Brasti both have big story arcs and undergo a lot of growth. Falcio does too in his own way, I just hope he’ll be smarter in the next one. It wouldn’t be such a big deal if he weren’t touted as this brilliant strategist. The man with a plan. Brasti says time and again, “and he’s supposed to be the smart one!” I’m with you, Brasti. I’m with you. It’s largely why I gave the book a four star rating and not five. Just like with the first one, I found Falcio’s ignorance too convenient, or the plot twist not twisty enough to warrant the fifth star. Still, there are WAY worse books out there, and I still love these goofy, sad, hopeless boys. Especially Kest. Did I mention that?

scarlet ohara gif.gif
Replace the daggers with a bow, and this is basically Brasti.

I’ve got the third book, Saint’s Blood, queued up on Audible but I haven’t started listening to it yet. I finally gave up on Revenger and moved on to the new Rivers of London book, The October Man. I’ll probably finish it tonight. Then I’ll start something new, probably by V.E. Schwab since I have two of her books laying around waiting to be read.

So yeah. Lots of reading ahead. It hit 100º today, which is WAY too hot for this early in the season, so I expect I’ll be indoors even more than usual. Good thing I have all these books waiting to be read!

Talk at you soon, Blogland!

 

BZ

 

Goals Summary 2019 – Wk #23

Y’all. Last week felt long, but not in a bad way. I felt like I moved through the week like Quicksilver, speeding by and getting shit done in half the time it would normally take. I wrote a short story, edited it, watched movies, went to the zoo, played video games, and worked more than usual!  I used that momentum to my advantage.quicksilver gif.gif

Last Week

  • Publish two blog posts
  • Write 1k on In Great Need of Ghosts
  • Finish listening to Knight’s Shadow
  • Start reading Revenger

How’d I do?

  • Publish two blog postsknight's shadow.jpg
    • Yarp. Three actually.
  • Write 1k on In Great Need of Ghosts
    • uhhh… yeah. Like, four times that.
  • Finish listening to Knight’s ShadowYes! It was a really good listen, too.
  • Start reading Revenger
    • Yes. It’s going kinda slow, but I’m about 75 pages in so I’ll give it a few more days.

Weekly Word Count: 4,009

That word count really tells you how I spent my week. The week before was slow going for the story, with under 1k words but Monday and Tuesday I hammered out the entire rough draft. I’ve revised it to its third draft and sent it to some folks for feedback. We’ll see what they think and see if my brain comes up with anything else to fix about it.

I finished listening to Knight’s Shadow and have a full review forthcoming. I finished it just in time for a new Audible credit, so I’ll be starting the third Greatcoats book soon. I’m struggling with Revenger. I’ll give it this week, but if it doesn’t grab me by then I’ll shelve it for something else on my TBR.

There was no hike this weekend, with my hiking buddy out of town, so I arranged for my family to get together and spend the day at the zoo. The Oregon Zoo was wonderful! there’s still a lot of construction happening as they’re in the final stages of using a bond from 2008, but the new enclosures are so awesome! Elephants have a North Meadow, a central pond, a South Meadow, and an indoor area. It’s designed to encourage the elephants to move, much like they would in the wild foraging for food. All of the elephants were incredibly active, moving from place to place, eating and interacting with one another. And by interacting, I mean interacting. Seeing elephants heed the call of nature wasn’t something I ever wanted to see and now I can’t unsee it. So, hurray… There were a lot of other amazing enclosures and the plan for the polar bear, chimpanzee, and rhino habitats look amazing. I’m excited to go back once it’s all done in 2020. oregon zoo.png

So, What’s Next?

  • Publish two blog posts
  • Polish In Great Need of Ghosts
  • Work on something fun!

I don’t have any major projects scheduled until July. I didn’t anticipate that this story would be so close to done so soon. I’ll spend this week hammering it out and polishing it, and see where that takes me. Last night I had a big urge to reread my long fanfic series, or to read other fanfic. I miss it a bit, so I think I’m going to spend the next two weeks reading and writing some fanfic. For once, I have the time and the motivation, so I ought to make good on it.

I should be hiking again this weekend, somewhere on the coast. So I have that to look forward to, and a week of gaming, reading and writing fanfic. What’s not to love?

I’ll be back this week with the review fo Knight’s Shadow. I don’t think I’ll be back with anything else, but let’s keep our fingers crossed. Maybe I’ll get some publishing news.

Until then, Bloggos,

 

BZ

Reading Round Up – May 2019

I feel like I didn’t read much this month, but that’s mostly because the first two weeks of the month were spent non-stop writing. With that in mind, I suppose I didn’t do half bad. Actually, now that I have it all gathered in one place, turns out I read quite a bit!

Title: Every Heart a Doorway (Wayward Children #1)every heart a doorway
Author: Seanan McGuire
Format: Hardback
Goodreads Rating: 4/5 Stars
Thoughts: I didn’t know anything about this series beyond the cover copy, so my expectations were basically non-existent. I really liked the characters, especially Jack and Christopher. I think it was a fun story that’s really inventive. Worth the afternoon to read it.
Recommend: Sure. It’s a fun, quick story that leaves you wanting more.

Title: Down Among the Sticks and Bones (Wayward Children #2)down among the sticks and bones
Author: Seanan McGuire
Format: Hardback
Goodreads Rating: 5/5 Stars
Thoughts: This is the story of Jack and Jill and their time in the Moors! Yes! I loved it. I ached for the twins when they were forced into roles and thoughts that were never their own. I really enjoy how McGuire can narrate such mundane moments with fairytale words. It weaves a spell over the whole story and I desperately want to emulate it.
Recommend: If you liked the first one, absolutely! There’s even more to love in this one.

Title: Beneath the Sugar Sky (Wayward Children #3)beneath a sugar sky
Author: Seanan McGuire
Format: Hardback
Goodreads Rating: 4/5 Stars
Thoughts: This was my least favorite of the three so far. I wasn’t very attached to Sumi and I didn’t much care for her daughter. I also didn’t feel much for Cora either, even though we share a lot of similarities. But, Kade and Christopher are back and I LOVE them, so it worked out. The Wayward Children venture into Confection to bring Sumi back to life so that her daughter can be born and the world saved from the false Queen. A really interesting plot, but I found Confection really frustrating. Nonesense worlds are not for me.
Recommend: Yep. Still totally worth an afternoon to read, and makes you a little warm and fuzzy inside at parts.

Title: Deadpool: Secret Agent Deadpoolsecret agent deadpool
Author(s): Chris Hastings and Salva Espin
Format: Graphic Novel
Goodreads Rating: 5/5 Stars
Thoughts: This comic book is absolutely ridiculous, and I mean that as a compliment. It’s basically Archer, but with Deadpool playing the title role after he mistakenly kills a secret agent and takes his place in the agency. The Merc with a Mouth gets to put his very specific set of skills to good use for once in this wild ride of a comic series.
Recommend: It’s Deadpool. If you like vulgarity, blood and gore, and absolutely insane plots, then you’re gonna love this volume.

Title: All Systems Red (The Murderbot Diaries #1)all systems red
Author: Martha Wells
Format: Hardback
Goodreads Rating: 5/5 Stars
Thoughts: This is another novella series that I knew nothing about before I dove into it. I just read the blurb that said “anti-social AI” and knew I should give it a try. Turns out, I too love Murderbot. I inhaled this novella and would happily read it again. The first person perspective is witty, casual, and hilarious. I laughed out loud frequently. The action sequences are incredibly well done and often awesome. Seriously, this is a great little book.
Recommend: Yes! I promise, if you don’t mind some F bombs here and there, you will love Murderbot too!

Title: Artificial Condition (The Murderbot Diaries #2)artificial condition
Author: Martha Wells
Format: Hardback
Goodreads Rating: 4/5 Stars
Thoughts: I loved this, and the only reason it didn’t get five stars is because I thought it could have been longer and a little more fleshed out. I also felt that Murderbot’s quest to figure out what happened before it had its memory purged was over too quickly, though I liked that it wasn’t a neat resolution. I also loved ART and hope it makes a comeback soon.
Recommend: Yep. If you liked the first one, you’ll like this one.

Title: Rogue Protocol (The Murderbot Diaries #3)rogue protocol
Author: Martha Wells
Format: Hardback
Goodreads Rating: 5/5 Stars
Thoughts: I think this is the story where Murderbot really hits its stride. This was a gripping action story with way more emotion than I was prepared for. I still laughed a bunch, don’t you worry, but I also cried a little too. Yet again, it’s Murderbot’s connections with other AI that really standout, this time with Miki, a “pet robot” that surprises Murderbot with how deeply it cares for the people around it. And how much those people care for it.
Recommend: Absolutely. Even if you weren’t in love with Artificial Condition, give this one a shot because it’s a return to form.

Title: The Wicked + the Divine vol. 8wicdiv 8
Author(s): Kieron Gillen, Jamie McKelvie, and Matt Wilson
Format: Graphic Novel
Goodreads Rating: 5/5 Stars
Thoughts: While this isn’t a continuation of the story so far, it is a super fun collection of side stories and prequels that give a little more context for the world and story. There are some really funny spoofs included as well, such as the Scooby Doo AU (that’s “Alternate Universe”) that had me cackling in bed and waking my husband repeatedly.
Recommend: If you’ve read the rest of the series so far, you should absolutely read this.

Title: Exit Strategy (The Murderbot Diaries #4)exit strategy
Author: Martha Wells
Format: Hardback
Goodreads Rating: 5/5 Stars
Thoughts: Holy hell. This book was tense. Nonstop action throughout and a return to Dr. Mensah and her team. I loved every moment of this story, though my fingernails probably hated it since they were chewed to the point of bleeding I was so stressed. Also, yes, I did cry at the end.
Recommend: Yes. You have to read this book, and if you haven’t yet, please read this series!

Title: Evil Eyeevil eye
Author: Madhuri Shekar
Format: Digital Audiobook
Narrator(s): Harsh Nayyar, Annapurna Sriram, Bernard White, Nick Choski, and Rita Wolf
Goodreads Rating: 5/5 Stars
Thoughts: This wasn’t on my radar at all but I was a little listless after finishing Murderbot and wanted to listen to something while I did chores. Since it was only a couple hours long I thought, why not? Turns out, this was a really impressive story I would have never tried without my Audible subscription. I loved the narrations, and though the story was a might predictable, I still really enjoyed it. The climax scene was incredibly intense to listen to and it definitely had me sweating.
Recommend: Yes! If you have an Audible subscription, this was one of the Audible Originals for May. I think you can still get it though. It’s only a couple hours long and totally worth it. It was a great way to power through some chores.

Title: “Splitskin”E. Catherine Tobler
Author: E. Catherine Tobler
Collection: Transcendent: the Year’s Best Transgender Speculative Fiction
Editor: K.M. Szpara
Format: Trade Paperback
Goodreads Rating: N/A
Thoughts: I won’t lie, I don’t think I understood half of what happened in this story, but it was so beautiful, so lyrical and poetic and utterly fascinating that I didn’t really care. I just wanted to languish in the language for a little bit longer. This is definitely one I would reread, in hopes of better comprehension and because the words were just that wonderful.
Recommend: Yes, but only if you can enjoy a story for the craft alone. I won’t guarantee that you like what it has to say, or even understand what it has to say. But if you likes words and how people string them together, you’ll like this story.

Title: “A Salt and Sterling Tongue”Emma Osborne
Author: Emma Osborne
Collection: N/A
Editor(s): N/A
Original Publication: Uncanny Magazine, Issue 28
Format: Digital Publication
Goodreads Rating: N/A
Thoughts: I loved this story. It’s very poetic with a rhythm that hints to the sea. It’s a heartbreaking story, so be prepared for that, but it’s really quite beautiful too. I think it’s worth a re-read sometime soon.
Recommend: Yes. It’s a little bit longer than I normally like, but it shouldn’t take long to actually read. It’s worth every moment.

Title: “The Need for Overwhelming Sensation”bogi takacs
Author: Bogi Takács
Collection: Transcendent: the Year’s Best Transgender Speculative Fiction
Editor(s): K.M. Szpara
Format: Trade Paperback
Goodreads Rating: N/A
Thoughts: This story is wild. A lot happens very quickly and I was left wondering what the hell was going on. I felt disoriented through it, but I’m not sure that wasn’t the point. There’s a very steep learning curve and you have to trust the story to give you context as you go. But, I ultimately liked the world building and the magic/science used to power lightspeed jumps. It was an extremely intriguing blend of Science Fiction and Fantasy that I admittedly loved. The plot was a little vague, even as so much was happening. I was never very certain about what the point of it all was. I still liked it.
Recommend: Sure! If nothing else, take a chance on it and see what you think.

Title: “The Librarian’s Dilemma”E. Saxey
Author: E. Saxey
Collection: Transcendent: the Year’s Best Transgender Speculative Fiction
Editor(s): K.M. Szpara
Format: Trade Paperback
Goodreads Rating: N/A
Thoughts: A very interesting story about a person who’s trying to modernize and digitize an academic library and encountering resistance from the head librarian. It’s shockingly pertinent to today’s slowly evolving libraries, but also asks a really important question: are there some writings that aren’t worth saving?
Recommend: Sure. If you have any experience with libraries I think this will be much more effective. I know I related to it because of that.